MMU Tourney Fight #3 Fastshow vs. KNVBeaker

Jinky · 05-08-2002, 05:53 PM

Fastshow 20-1 versus KNVB 30-1

Battle of the moderators, although Fasty has only a passing aquaintance with the word moderation and Beaker is anything but a moderate, he's like Mikey, he hates everything.

Okay that's enough of the Max Bretos type introduction.

This is MMU's version of a slow race. Both of them registered victories (barely) over weak opposition amongst some of this feature's poorest ratings.
This should be a glamour match-up but won't be unless the two of them can work some magic.

**knvb** · 05-09-2002, 12:18 AM

A tough draw to start, but at 30-1 I would have to think any draw I got would be tough. The last thing I should do here is get into a "war of the words" battle with Fastshow. I'll just have to let my reputation as a moderator speak for it's self.

Jinky you have me mistaken. I don't hate everything, I just think I'm better than everybody.There's a difference. I say I'm to proud, to fit, and to big to go down to the English softy. I fight in the trenches off TTP daily (twice on weekends) where as Fasty sits high above on his lofty perch chastising all who don't measure up. Music, books and foreign movies are his thing. Where as I will dig in and go toe to toe with any WOP willing.

Let me just ask you all this........ Do you really want to read Fastshow wank on and on about getting into the Elite 8? Look what happens when they win a WC football match for God's sake. Good thing that's a rarity.

**Hands of Stone** · 05-09-2002, 11:12 AM

Fastshow has the speed and will run large circles around KNVHenry, to win the match.

Woh its the Fastshow.

HOS

One Dart · 05-09-2002, 11:57 AM

I had to vote for you KNVB. It pains me a great deal but there is simply no way that Fastshow would be able to defeat you. I mean, all you have to do is distract him with a pitcher of stella and he's done. Plus, his time at the aldgate exchange has weakened him, he stands no chance against someone who braves everyday in slurrey.

Fastshow · 05-09-2002, 12:09 PM

If I had a trainer I'd get her to chuck in the white towel on this one. How many times do I have to tell people that I'm not fcuking Irish and have never been to Ireland?

At least if KNVB wins this (under protest) bout, he'll be able to continue through as many rounds as there are. I, on the other hand, would have to forfeit eventually since I'm going to the World Cup. I hear KNVB doesn't have any concrete plans for the summer. Shame, really.

Jimmy Holiday · 05-10-2002, 10:30 AM

Voted for him just to keep it close and.....

I DON"T LIKE YOU KNVB!

**Regs** · 05-10-2002, 10:33 AM

... because I want to see what happens if it is a draw at the end

~TB.

**knvb** · 05-10-2002, 11:03 AM

Et tu Slappy?

the power · 05-10-2002, 11:15 AM

No contest. KNVB let the Province photo go to his head. He was drunk on his own "popularity" - I'm only waiting for a
Tyson-esque rant about how his Dutch heritage leaves him vulnerable to attacks, with other thoughts questioning the sexuality of other TTPer's thrown in. Sorry KNVB, as OD told you in the mini golf thread...

Quote:

You're a Loser

Ballbaby · 05-10-2002, 11:35 AM

This is truly a dilemma. Fasty is a good friend and it appears knvb and I are getting along famously as well. Fasty is a lover and not a fighter. I'm pretty sure he can hold his own if someone tried to steal his pint, or something along those lines, but generally Fasty is as agressive as a sloth.

Knvb on the other hand is a wirey, gangly fellow, who definately has a temper. He is pasty white and bright red arterial blood would look absolutely shocking on his outermost layer of epidermis. He would not like that, almost assuredly leading him to passing out in horror if he were to catch sight of such a scene. Therefore he would not allow such a thing to happen. He would fight much more aggresively to avoid such a debacle so I have to thow my support in his favour. Besides he just private messaged me with a bribe.

**knvb** · 05-10-2002, 12:29 PM

The Power~

You don't know what it's like being me! You couldn't fcuking handle it. You're all a bunch of pussies! You don't know what it like being me! I eat bitches like you for breakfast! Faggots! You wouldn't last a week in my life!

A no contest is what we term you on Wednesday's. It a known fact that everyone looks to play you to pad their stats. Your jealousy towards me is very evident.

Balls, Thanks for the vote. I think. The girls and cash are on there way.

**knvb** · 05-10-2002, 02:55 PM

It's late and I think he's cut.

Out of friends, Breaker.

Saint · 05-10-2002, 03:40 PM

It has been said that avoiding tragedy requires a sense of it, which in turn requires a sense of history. While such sentiments may appear necessarily flawed, I think, as we approach the waning moments of this battle, it is important to remind everyone of the tragedy of not voting for TTP’s greatest helmsman and most historic character, Fastshow.

The sole reason for my late night voyeurism, Fasty is an inveterate member of the piss-taking community. True, he has a penchant for incessant logorrhea, and his Britannic idioms can sometimes confuse and befuddle the best of us. But, lest we forget that he is a kind, sweet-hearted person whose altruism knows no boundaries, the manner in which he protects us from the lederhosen-one is cause enough for my vote – sausage-sucking fairy that Keeper is – and should be enough for all of you. Gaffa, Jinky, Tee, Sarge, Regs (vote twice, you have the power) et al., vote now: our prodigal son needs help.

Of course, this call to arms of the “TTPF” (Take-the-Piss-Fasties) is not indicative of any morose feelings towards KNVB. He’s nice and all, and I’ve heard that he’s nay a bad arrow chucker, but please, he’s not a comma of the man that sentence-Fastshow is.

Don’t let this tragedy occur, we need him for amusement and entertainment.

Here endeth mine plea,

By the way, none of this has anything to do with my potentially moving to London in September and needing a place to stay!

Guinness · 05-10-2002, 04:13 PM

Saint, you sure know how to throw the whole TTP community for a right pause........... then we all realise, you yourself need to post more often (rather than being the pro Lurker you are) to have any pull with the likes of Jinky... He is a TTP icon and shouldn't even be mentioned in the same breath as most other insignificant TTPers...
Saint, Fastshow does contribute to the community in many positive ways, however he doesn't have the power nor the gaul to beg for votes through the PM market!!!

That's where he falls down inthis one...

Guinness

PS. Nice speech, I guess you learned something at UBC after all.

**knvb** · 05-10-2002, 05:04 PM

This reminds me of the epic battle in Rocky I. You have in one corner the well schooled, fast talking Apollo Creed vs. the low life bum who has to work and fight for a living , Rocky.

Who will get to the ropes first?

Our great promoter Jinky could make or break this bout with his vote. Either way I know I've put a great fight with a more than worthy opponent. I can't see anyone beating the Wet paper baG anyway.

Saint. What does the monkshood think of you breaking your vow of silence. Shame on you. You were doing so well.

Saint · 05-11-2002, 01:37 AM

You see? I told you that KNVBeaker was easier to beat than a prisoner in shackles.

Jinky · 05-11-2002, 01:38 AM

But a prisoner in shackles would be very easy to beat.

Saint · 05-11-2002, 01:41 AM

Yeah, I know. That's the joke; I'm comparing the ease of beating a shackled prisoner to the easy beatability of KNVBeaker.

Jinky · 05-11-2002, 01:45 AM

Of course.

One Dart · 05-11-2002, 01:49 AM

Give KNVB a break, he got real big on the taste of burgers and fries now he's down to a smaller size, he's Henry, KNVhenry. Besides, lets remember that Fastshow is in England and the he plays darts with an electronic scoreboard. At least KNVB can add (he has trouble sometimes though, can't forget that he's from Slurrey).

View Poll Results: You Decide The Winner
Fightin' Fastshow O' Malley	13	52.00%
KNVBeaker	12	48.00%
Voters: 25. You may not vote on this poll

05-08-2002, 05:53 PM	#1 (permalink)
Jinky Member Joined: Jun 2001 Location: locally Posts: 2,993 Images: 28 TTP Friends: (0)	MMU Tourney Fight #3 Fastshow 20-1 versus KNVB 30-1 Battle of the moderators, although Fasty has only a passing aquaintance with the word moderation and Beaker is anything but a moderate, he's like Mikey, he hates everything. Okay that's enough of the Max Bretos type introduction. This is MMU's version of a slow race. Both of them registered victories (barely) over weak opposition amongst some of this feature's poorest ratings. This should be a glamour match-up but won't be unless the two of them can work some magic.

05-09-2002, 12:18 AM	#2 (permalink)
knvb Kick'n it old school... A Total Bastard Joined: Aug 2001 Location: Langley Posts: 10,572 Images: 229 TTP Friends: (6)	"I've seen Fastshow fight and I was impressed with his lack of knowledge." A tough draw to start, but at 30-1 I would have to think any draw I got would be tough. The last thing I should do here is get into a "war of the words" battle with Fastshow. I'll just have to let my reputation as a moderator speak for it's self. Jinky you have me mistaken. I don't hate everything, I just think I'm better than everybody.There's a difference. I say I'm to proud, to fit, and to big to go down to the English softy. I fight in the trenches off TTP daily (twice on weekends) where as Fasty sits high above on his lofty perch chastising all who don't measure up. Music, books and foreign movies are his thing. Where as I will dig in and go toe to toe with any WOP willing. Let me just ask you all this........ Do you really want to read Fastshow wank on and on about getting into the Elite 8? Look what happens when they win a WC football match for God's sake. Good thing that's a rarity. Last edited by knvb; 05-09-2002 at 12:23 AM.

05-09-2002, 11:12 AM	#3 (permalink)
Hands of Stone Premium Member A Better Bastard Joined: Jul 2001 Location: The NAP, Home of the Mighty Rangers Posts: 4,442 Images: 7 TTP Friends: (6)	KNV Henry Too Big of a Target NOW Fastshow has the speed and will run large circles around KNVHenry, to win the match. Woh its the Fastshow. HOS

05-09-2002, 11:57 AM	#4 (permalink)
One Dart Member Joined: Feb 2002 Location: Where are the nuggets? Posts: 2,138 TTP Friends: (0)	Unfortunately I had to vote for you KNVB. It pains me a great deal but there is simply no way that Fastshow would be able to defeat you. I mean, all you have to do is distract him with a pitcher of stella and he's done. Plus, his time at the aldgate exchange has weakened him, he stands no chance against someone who braves everyday in slurrey.

05-09-2002, 12:09 PM	#5 (permalink)
Fastshow Member Joined: Jun 2001 Posts: 2,305 Images: 111 TTP Friends: (0)	hell's bollocks... If I had a trainer I'd get her to chuck in the white towel on this one. How many times do I have to tell people that I'm not fcuking Irish and have never been to Ireland? At least if KNVB wins this (under protest) bout, he'll be able to continue through as many rounds as there are. I, on the other hand, would have to forfeit eventually since I'm going to the World Cup. I hear KNVB doesn't have any concrete plans for the summer. Shame, really.

05-10-2002, 10:30 AM	#6 (permalink)
Jimmy Holiday Member Joined: Jul 2001 Location: Newlands Golf and Country Posts: 875 TTP Friends: (0)	Fastshow Voted for him just to keep it close and..... I DON"T LIKE YOU KNVB!

05-10-2002, 10:33 AM	#7 (permalink)
Regs Respect & Honour A Total Bastard Joined: Jun 2001 Location: TTP Headquarters Posts: 12,045 Blog Entries: 1 Images: 233 TTP Friends: (12)	Fasty ... because I want to see what happens if it is a draw at the end ~TB. __________________ Take the piss (out of someone) vb. British -- to mock, deride, poke fun (at). This vulgarism has been in widespread use since the late 1940s. The original idea evoked by the expression was that of deflating someone, recalling the description of a self-important blusterer as 'all piss and wind.'

05-10-2002, 11:03 AM	#8 (permalink)
knvb Kick'n it old school... A Total Bastard Joined: Aug 2001 Location: Langley Posts: 10,572 Images: 229 TTP Friends: (6)	Et tu Slappy?

05-10-2002, 11:35 AM	#10 (permalink)
Ballbaby Member Joined: Jul 2001 Location: in a parking lot with lots and lots of speedbumps Posts: 1,424 Images: 9 TTP Friends: (1)	This is truly a dilemma. Fasty is a good friend and it appears knvb and I are getting along famously as well. Fasty is a lover and not a fighter. I'm pretty sure he can hold his own if someone tried to steal his pint, or something along those lines, but generally Fasty is as agressive as a sloth. Knvb on the other hand is a wirey, gangly fellow, who definately has a temper. He is pasty white and bright red arterial blood would look absolutely shocking on his outermost layer of epidermis. He would not like that, almost assuredly leading him to passing out in horror if he were to catch sight of such a scene. Therefore he would not allow such a thing to happen. He would fight much more aggresively to avoid such a debacle so I have to thow my support in his favour. Besides he just private messaged me with a bribe.

05-10-2002, 12:29 PM	#11 (permalink)
knvb Kick'n it old school... A Total Bastard Joined: Aug 2001 Location: Langley Posts: 10,572 Images: 229 TTP Friends: (6)	The Power~ You don't know what it's like being me! You couldn't fcuking handle it. You're all a bunch of pussies! You don't know what it like being me! I eat bitches like you for breakfast! Faggots! You wouldn't last a week in my life! A no contest is what we term you on Wednesday's. It a known fact that everyone looks to play you to pad their stats. Your jealousy towards me is very evident. Balls, Thanks for the vote. I think. The girls and cash are on there way.

05-10-2002, 02:55 PM	#12 (permalink)
knvb Kick'n it old school... A Total Bastard Joined: Aug 2001 Location: Langley Posts: 10,572 Images: 229 TTP Friends: (6)	It's late and I think he's cut. Out of friends, Breaker.

05-10-2002, 03:40 PM	#13 (permalink)
Saint Member Joined: Jul 2001 Location: . Posts: 85 TTP Friends: (0)	Fastshow needs help! It has been said that avoiding tragedy requires a sense of it, which in turn requires a sense of history. While such sentiments may appear necessarily flawed, I think, as we approach the waning moments of this battle, it is important to remind everyone of the tragedy of not voting for TTP’s greatest helmsman and most historic character, Fastshow. The sole reason for my late night voyeurism, Fasty is an inveterate member of the piss-taking community. True, he has a penchant for incessant logorrhea, and his Britannic idioms can sometimes confuse and befuddle the best of us. But, lest we forget that he is a kind, sweet-hearted person whose altruism knows no boundaries, the manner in which he protects us from the lederhosen-one is cause enough for my vote – sausage-sucking fairy that Keeper is – and should be enough for all of you. Gaffa, Jinky, Tee, Sarge, Regs (vote twice, you have the power) et al., vote now: our prodigal son needs help. Of course, this call to arms of the “TTPF” (Take-the-Piss-Fasties) is not indicative of any morose feelings towards KNVB. He’s nice and all, and I’ve heard that he’s nay a bad arrow chucker, but please, he’s not a comma of the man that sentence-Fastshow is. Don’t let this tragedy occur, we need him for amusement and entertainment. Here endeth mine plea, By the way, none of this has anything to do with my potentially moving to London in September and needing a place to stay!

05-10-2002, 04:13 PM	#14 (permalink)
Guinness Member Joined: Sep 2001 Location: crossing my T's & dotting my I's Posts: 3,407 Images: 1 TTP Friends: (2)	WHOA!!! Saint, you sure know how to throw the whole TTP community for a right pause........... then we all realise, you yourself need to post more often (rather than being the pro Lurker you are) to have any pull with the likes of Jinky... He is a TTP icon and shouldn't even be mentioned in the same breath as most other insignificant TTPers... Saint, Fastshow does contribute to the community in many positive ways, however he doesn't have the power nor the gaul to beg for votes through the PM market!!! That's where he falls down inthis one... Guinness PS. Nice speech, I guess you learned something at UBC after all. __________________ AVATAR enlarged: http://www.takethepiss.com/multimedi...s&cutoffdate=1 Last edited by Guinness; 05-10-2002 at 04:19 PM.

05-10-2002, 05:04 PM	#15 (permalink)
knvb Kick'n it old school... A Total Bastard Joined: Aug 2001 Location: Langley Posts: 10,572 Images: 229 TTP Friends: (6)	This reminds me of the epic battle in Rocky I. You have in one corner the well schooled, fast talking Apollo Creed vs. the low life bum who has to work and fight for a living , Rocky. Who will get to the ropes first? Our great promoter Jinky could make or break this bout with his vote. Either way I know I've put a great fight with a more than worthy opponent. I can't see anyone beating the Wet paper baG anyway. Saint. What does the monkshood think of you breaking your vow of silence. Shame on you. You were doing so well. Last edited by knvb; 05-10-2002 at 06:17 PM.

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05-11-2002, 01:37 AM	#16 (permalink)
Saint Member Joined: Jul 2001 Location: . Posts: 85 TTP Friends: (0)	You see? I told you that KNVBeaker was easier to beat than a prisoner in shackles.

05-11-2002, 01:38 AM	#17 (permalink)
Jinky Member Joined: Jun 2001 Location: locally Posts: 2,993 Images: 28 TTP Friends: (0)	But a prisoner in shackles would be very easy to beat.

05-11-2002, 01:41 AM	#18 (permalink)
Saint Member Joined: Jul 2001 Location: . Posts: 85 TTP Friends: (0)	Yeah, I know. That's the joke; I'm comparing the ease of beating a shackled prisoner to the easy beatability of KNVBeaker. Last edited by Saint; 05-11-2002 at 02:11 AM.

05-11-2002, 01:45 AM	#19 (permalink)
Jinky Member Joined: Jun 2001 Location: locally Posts: 2,993 Images: 28 TTP Friends: (0)	Of course.

05-11-2002, 01:49 AM	#20 (permalink)
One Dart Member Joined: Feb 2002 Location: Where are the nuggets? Posts: 2,138 TTP Friends: (0)	Ease up Give KNVB a break, he got real big on the taste of burgers and fries now he's down to a smaller size, he's Henry, KNVhenry. Besides, lets remember that Fastshow is in England and the he plays darts with an electronic scoreboard. At least KNVB can add (he has trouble sometimes though, can't forget that he's from Slurrey).