Mythical Match Up - Cainy vs. Star P.I.M.P

Who win would this fight of TTP wit[B]t[/B]?

  • Star 'I'm not a hater' P.I.M.P

    Votes: 3 9.4%
  • Cainy

    Votes: 25 78.1%
  • No Decision

    Votes: 4 12.5%

  • Total voters
    32
  • Poll closed .

knvb

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Mythical match ups: If these two competitors were to meet in the squared circle and their taking the piss skills were substituted for actual fighting skills who would win? How would it happen?

Our first two combatants.

In the Red corner.....BC Special Olympic Berry Picking Champion, wearing the blue Fubu tank top, complete with Adidas head band, oversized gold chain with the dollar sign medallion, and baggy designer jeans, weighing in at 128 and a half pounds. It looks like our challenger has just come from another brawl, because he has a small band-aid under his eye. Look out for the arsenal of Moma jokes and hip hop dance moves. Proceeds from this event go to the Scott Road Literacy Foundation- Pimpin’ ain’t easy…

STARRRRRRRRR PIMP!


And in the blue corner we have weighing in at a buck 32 wearing a blue and black singlet... an x- BC Wrestl'n champion turn all star coach, egg toss and sack race blue ribbon winner. He brings to the ring, a tell it like he see's it, no chance of being wrong style He is also the leader of the PAU Nation... Please give a big round of applause and welcome to...

CCCCCAAAAAIIIINNNNNYYYYYYY.
 

TOFFEE

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I Think Cainy would win becuase 1: he has a little touch of small man syndrome, 2: is a ginger ming, and 3: everyone would eventually get sick of reading his long piss takes that go over everthing he thinks is shyte about the person he is up against....wow i almost sounded like cainy there...go champ go

P.S. KNVB IS A CNUT
 

Regs

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Cainy will win this one, no doubt.

Star PIMP has absolutely no back up here in the TTP squared circle whereas Cainy has a plethora of PAU "Noonies" that will step in at the first drop of a fedora.

In the remote chance that there is a corrupt decision, Cainy will appeal on the grounds of something totally irrevalent to the match, blaming the VMSL and Surrey United or phantom "hoes", resulting in Regs using his god-like powers to overturn the result and awarding the FA Cup facsimile trophy (AKA the covetted Regs Head Mold) to Cainy.

The Cup will then be renamed the Ginger Nobody Cup where challengers Dickens Cider, Red Dragon and Ginger Tours will attempt to beat the crap outta Cainy for weeks to come.

Can't wait.

~Regs.
 

Guinness

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Ginge Minge

I'd have to say wee cainy in a landslide... G.I.M.P. has nae chance of winning a fight with a wet paper bag (although it outweighs cainy) let a lone a Mystical match up with the singlette strutting Cloverdale boy!!! A quick bite on the ankle followed by an uppercut to the schnuts, finishing with an eye poke and the Gimpy one is out like a light... Nighty night buudy...;)

So fcuking Easy, like Regs missus...:eek: :)

Guinness


BTW, Regs has Cainy slept with your mum or something??? What's with you big hard on for the PAU Nation's token red headed stepchild Cainy??? :rolleyes: :p
 

Jinky

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Fcuking hell Beaker, you are a cnut.

I was planning to resurrect the Mythical (not mystical) Match-Ups to address a number of new disputes and I dearly wish I hadn't been my usual procrastinating self.

What kind of a match-maker are you supposed to be?

No one wants to see Cainy versus Star Pimp ya tube. That's a total blow-out.
If Cainy is going to dust off his fight-tights for anyone it should be for TotalBastard. And it will. Very fcuking soon. I'll also find a more suitable opponent for the 50 cent gimp.

Futhermore, what's all this about?

Mythical match ups: If these two competitors were to meet in the squared circle and their taking the piss skills were substituted for actual fighting skills who would win? How would it happen?
There are no substitutions. Fighting skills should very much be taken into consideration. Cnut.

ps Spelling skills are unimportant. Scathing whit, Katerina Witt, Ernie Witt,...who cares?
 

Jinky

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Oh well, it looks as though I can't play matchmaker afterall.

I'll get my coat.
 

Gurps

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Cainy in a landslide

Trust me, I have seen Star Chimp, this guy has enough trouble washing orange pop from his face, let alone fighting a FVSL'er. :D
 

Rangerforever

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We're on the march we're Cainy's Army...

Cainy with the "Half Pretzel".
Done.
No need to even go to the "Full Pretzel".

Star Gimp is just no Ivan The Terrible unfortunately.

He'd do Billy Connelly proud in the "wit" department as well as the wrestling ring.




Mikey Cain in the wrestling ring..
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah...
 

TOFFEE

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Please note that cainy is a scouser, so while this P.I.M.P VS The John face off is going on, Guinness( cause scott's are always in for a bit of a dirty) and the PAU lads will be swagging stuff for P.I.M.P's car or house like a local hood would do if a truck stopped at a light in the middle of the liverpool.:wa:

But cainy to win by a red hair!
 

Hands of Stone

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Fity Cent

Have to say that the 50 Cent song P.I.M.P. is catchy, and all the Pimps out there keep all us guys supplied with HO's, so I am going with Star Pimp.
I am sure that Cainy will get distracted by the HO Train and Star Pimp will catch him with a cheap shot to the groin. Game over, bring in the HO Train to celebrate.

Hello Ladies,

Val
 

Big T

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Hey knvb,

could you like do a Beaker's Pit with the wrestlers a week before....I wanna see Cainy and Nation of Domination, i mean PAU nation ;)....tell off the pimp and then listen to pimp's retort - "Cainy u jus suck, PAU sucks, u know da pimp 2 good at takin beats, i gets beats up all the time and i been shot 10 times" :D

I totally see this match going to Cainy after the nation of domination roughs up pimp while the ref is distracted. :D
 

Knees United

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Why oh why do I get involved??????

Can't sat I know the G.I.M.P but I know Cainy......and the only one that can bet Cainy is himself; for example.....

1) Preparation Time:

If you don't give Cainy enough time to "powder his nose" he's liable to miss the match all together. If the twat needs 2 hrs to get ready for a soccer match, how much time does he need for this?

Note to Cainy....Eyes will burn from the mixer of Sweat & Sun-In....wear goggles.

2) Dress Code:

If Cainy is "forced" to wear his yellow singlet he's liable to distract himself with his self proclaimed "deadsexy" body.

Hey Cainy, hands off the "length" fella!!! It'll be there when you get home!!

3) Mock 3 shortage:

What if prior to the match Cainy realizes he has no razor, and good buddy Jefferies', isn't packin' either!! Can't fight without a freshly shaven chest you know!!!!

***************Forest GIMP, by default*****************
 

Gurps

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A sure way of ensuring that Cainy wins would be to inform the Surrey RCMP of a "overloaded van of berry pickers" coming into town. That would be Star Chimps only mode of transportation out of the boonies into town, as tractors are not allowed on the freeway, and there is no way he has his drivers licence, as you need to be able to at least read english to get a drivers license....although I do live in Richmond and that point could easily be contested:(
 

cainy

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Easy money

I would lance STAR PIMPLE.:(
I have some experience with the brown folk. This is a true story if I've ever told one. I wrestled in the NORKAM invitational in Kamloops one time. Our team arrives, and we check out the draws. First up for me was a lad from Kamloops named Ballrash sp ( Balraj) sidhu. Of course all the lads are having a laff cause I gotta fight some dude named Ballrash, anyways long story short. The match starts and I get him down, decide to try a gut wrench manoeuver, synch up around his waist,just as I am turning him over he shits himself right there on the mat. No fcukin joke, when I wrenched his guts I heard like this really wet fart go. Of course Ballrash says in a really painful voice. " i think i shite myself" I'm like fcuk off you did, and he's like "no really I think I shite myself. I pinned Balrash so fast after that, the fat lady hadn't even cleared her throat. I'm not sure it was my superior wrestling skill or Ballrash, just wanted to get out of there so he could go wipe his ass.:(
Star PIMP you ain't got shite on me:wa:
 

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