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Like many of his goalscoring chances in Vancouver, Darren Mattocks will be missed: A...

AFTN

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Like many of his goalscoring chances in Vancouver, Darren Mattocks will be missed: A farewell gallery

It was the day we’ve preparing three years for but, deep down, we never thought it would come. Darren Mattocks has been traded!

In a case of GAM, TAM, thank you bam, Caleb Porter has reunited with his old Akron alumni and taken the Jamaican striker to Portland.

His departure leaves a gaping hole, so big that Darren would miss it from four yards out. What are we going to speculate on now? What can we ask Robbo about at training?

Mattocks will remain in the Whitecaps history books as the player to score Vancouver’s first playoff goal of the MLS era, against LA in 2012, but many will more remember the striker for his misses, his head on his hands contortions, and of course, that infamous Jamaican television interview where he proclaimed many things, including the fact that he carried the team on his back. No wonder he had to keep arching it.

But we saw a changed Mattocks in his four years in Vancouver. Gone was the brash young player who talked about himself in the third person, and he was replaced by a Darren that spoke about knowing his role and his place in the team and couldn’t say the word team enough in fact. That electro shock treatment worked a charm!

After famously proclaiming that he’d score 20 goals at the start of the 2013 season, he leaves Vancouver having scored just over that number in his four years here.

Mattocks leaves the Whitecaps with a record of 110 appearances (96 in MLS, 11 Canadian Championship and 3 Champions League), 22 goals and 7 assists.

He’s now with a Cascadian rival and we’re pretty sure he’ll find the back of the net for them, probably against the ‘Caps, while driving the Timbers Army up the wall at the same time.

Maybe this will be the move that sees Mattocks find his international form at club level. Will Porter unlock whatever it is that prevents him turning his chances and runs into goals? We’ll see, but there is little doubt that this move is the best thing for both the player and the ‘Caps.

Goodbye Darren and thanks for your contributions to the Whitecaps. Like many of his goalscoring chances while he was here in Vancouver, he’ll be missed.

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dezza

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Feb 20, 2005
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WTF? Missed? By whom?

Maybe the worst AFTN article I've seen :mad:

Did you read it?

It doesn't say he'll be missed on the field, rather off the field by the reporters who just lost one perpetual sideshow to write about!
 

Dude

Lifetime Better Bastard
Jul 23, 2001
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The article is laced with sarcasm, so actually not bad. He generated a lot of discussion, you can't deny that, and it was fun, in a tortuous sort of way, to break down just how shitty DM is as a player.

I do wish him well...he is, after all, trying to live our dream, and still making a go of it. Good for him. I refuse to call him a footballer, though.
 

cascadesoccer

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If this doesn't work out for him perhaps he has a chance in bobsledding. Feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme, get on up, ITS BOBSLED TIME!!
 

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