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The Truth about Jan Bulis

The Franchise

Lifetime Better Bastard
TTP Bookie Staff
Sep 7, 2004
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Here is the complete truth about Jan.......

The Truth About Jan Bulis



Jan Bulis: Penalty Killer Extraordinaire, Master of the Hip-Check, Pavol Demitra wanna-be.

Bulis doesn't get a whole lot of love and respect from Canucks' fan and media, because these people just don't know the REAL Jan Bulis.

Things about Jan Bulis you didn't know ...


Jan Bulis counted to infinity - twice.

Jan Bulis is Luke Skywalker’s real father

They once made a Jan Bulis toilet paper. It wouldn't take shite from anybody.

Jan Bulis is what Willis was talking about.

Jan Bulis only masturbates to pictures of Jan Bulis ... and Pavol Demitra

Jan Bulis sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled penalty-killing ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Bulis bodychecked the devil into the boards and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Jan Bulis isn’t lactose intolerant. He just doesn’t put up with lactose’s shite.

Dairy Queen used to be Dairy King before Jan Bulis made it his bitch.

There is no "I" in team. There is an "I" in Jan Bulis. Screw you, team.

Jan Bulis' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Jan Bulis is the reason Waldo is hiding.

Jan Bulis can speak braille.

Jan Bulis doesn't have a computer, just a basement full of Asian kids that memorize numbers.

Jan Bulis can delete the Recycling Bin.

On his birthday, Jan Bulis randomly selects one lucky kitten to be thrown into the sun.

When Jan Bulis gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have to live.
 

Dude

Lifetime Better Bastard
Jul 23, 2001
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Chuck Norris esque. I will never think of Jan the same again.

Add one: Forget the Chinese, Jan Bullis is to blame for Global Warming.
 

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