2003 Kamloops August Long Weekend

[hard ballz]

wow....

I went up to Kamloops for the friday and saturday nights.....what a beer garden! It was packed right from the get-go! Obiviously packed with RUFC. Temple was one of the teams to have the 1:15 and 6:30 games and it was great for the most part. We beat Kamloops 4-2 and tied UCC 1-1 on saturday.....Larsson had 3 goals so far for us in the first 2 games. Temple also had about 10 ttper's on the squad. I also know that Norvan was undefeated on saturday.....as for RUFC, I think it was more the drinking than the playing......p.s....Is Downtown Animal's brother? Why?...because it was Animal's brother walking around inside Boston Pizza with a t-shirt and a fcuken diaper on.....it was hilarious......Mackers and Animal....nice to see you guys again!


Hard Ballz

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Back a little early thanks to a 9:30 eviction last night. The best part of the eviction(only two rooms evicted) was that we weren't even in our room when the police came with security. Thanks. When I arrived to the room, we were being told by a big fat cnut of police officer, that we had two minutes to leave or we will be arrested. Club I Champ(Squeaks) was a little lucky he wasn't thrown in the tank. When I asked the tub of shite if I could finish my beer, he said I could if I wanted to go to jail for the night. So I didn't quite finish it. Parkhead arrived back about 3 minutes after me with the A + W only to be told the same thing. When we asked how they could throw us out and we weren't even in our room, they said there were complaints. Remember, no one was in our room. The other room had one occupant at the time. He was sleeping. He too was woken up by the cnut of a cop, uttering the same threats...To make a long story short, we decided because of the principle of the matter to MISS the dance. Yes, miss the dance. It was quite possibly the most difficult decision I had to make in life(almost as difficult to decide if I wanted to marry). So I will let Parkhead and Squeaks tell their side of things. If Boxcar ever finds his house, perhaps he can sign up on TTP, to give us an account of life on the street- Kamloops style. Apparently, the park benches are a comfortable place to have a kip.

As for the tourney, we went 1 - 1 - 1, losing our last game in penalties. Of course we didn't take them seriously as there were cartwheels, backheels, spinning toe pokes thrown into the mix. I must admit the three teams we played were shite. We started both morning games with 8 players, thanks to late arrivals. The beer garden was spectacular and Sammy was in tre-men-dous form. A lot of laughs. It is good to see other teams copy the Pocomo idea for the Kamloops shirts. Perhaps a form of flattery in there somewhere? Who knows?

The club on Friday was decent and Saturday night was spent in our rooms playing CAPS. Club I Champ and Boxcar took a beating from the Captain and Parkhead. This inevitably led to Boxcar's demise. As I said, we were planning to go to the dance, but elected to drive home last night. It was a nice quick trip, one that other people will not be experiencing this afternoon. Pita Pit was the only food eaten and cider was the only beverage for the Captain.

I forgot to mention that Parkhead's car broke down on the way to Kamloops. Two fellows (they weren't gay) pulled over and took us into Kamloops, GAVE us a courtesy car for nothing, and went to Canadian Tire because they knew guys there. They then invited us over for beers and a bit of cocaine. I accepted the beer of course but declined on the latter offer. Other than that, a pretty normal weekend in Kamloops. Downtown took center stage with his rendition of Sweet Caroline and StepChild has a lovely looking nurse friend. Fcuking amazing, StepChild. Lots of knockers at the beer garden too. So Pocomo has something special planned for next year and I will definitely hope to be a part of it. I better start saving now.

Captain.

P.S. I actually won money at the casino on Friday($75) and Saturday($150) but took a lump-ing yesterday to the tune of $80.

 

[ParkHead]

Pretty much covers everything Captain. Beer garden was absolutely top knotch. Missing the dance was a difficult decision to make but in the end I believe Stu and ourselves made the correct choice. Leave Kamloops last night after 10:30 and climbing into my own bed at 2:00. I gaurentee known one will make that trip today in that time.

Putting both the youngsters(Boxcar & Squeaks) under the table on the Saturday night was almost worth the trip in itself to see two guys under the age of 22 out cold and the vetrans still enjoying finishing off their leftover beer.

Thank You to Downtown for hammering me on the penalty which is on film so I have the evidence. A special thank you to the fat fcuking cop for his patience and the whole 2 mins to pack your things and be thrown out the back door of the hotel. Just great stuff.


Captain I believe you forgot to mention the incident at 6:00am on saturday night in the room we got turfed from!


Parkheadhopestomakethedancenextyear

 

[Captain Shamrock]

The incident.....

Yes, I forgot to mention that I took a piss at 6:00 am...... in the floor between the two beds, while two people watched in horror. Boxcar was lucky he wasn't sleeping where he was on Friday night.......

 

[ParkHead]

Yes I forgot Boxcar had slept there the night before. He is lucky that the park benches are more comfortable than his bed I guess.


Parkhead

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Nutmegs and K-Vale 7 made an appearance too. Nutmegs came through in the clutch, pulling a meg off within 10 minutes, to earn 1 drink from the Captain. Nutmegs then scored a 'normal' goal and followed it up with a sprint to the beer garden. The cider was consumed in about 8.5 seconds, which beat Thriller Miller by about 3 seconds. Pretty impressive because she had a good 40 yard sprint before consuming.

K-Vale 7 came through by wearing "The Balaclava" for a solid 5 minutes of warm-up. She then decided that a 1 - 0 win was enough for her team, as she chose to shoot the ball over the bar on purpose. A very classy move indeed.

Nutmegs, who won the final in your division? Any other divisions for that matter. I believe the Blaze were playing in the final but I don't know who it was against.

Captain

 

[LION]

The Blaze lost in there final.
UCC beat NorVan in the first Overtime 1-0 on a brilliant volley in to the top corner from 25 yards out. Beer garden today had some good #'s for it being a monday, no music though.

 

[BlazeArmy]

We lost the open final 1-0 to a Red deer team who had a 1:00 am curfew on dance night. BullS*it! Who the hell puts a curfew on dance night. Our guys were rolling in at 5:00 am or not at all and those guys are in bed. Weak!! I let them know it or tried to but the lack of a voice was a serious problem. Next year I'm taking a whiteboard with me foer around my neck so I can save my voice.

good weekend soccerwise. We lsot the final but only alowed 2 goals in 5 games and 1 of those was a penalty.

partywise another spectacular weekend. Friday night at the Max , saturday at Magnums and sunday the Dance. discovered Rota's home of the cheap steak sandwich(quality as well).
1 room kicked out on Friday but other than that it was not to bad.

Missed the Captain at the dance but Onk was well looked after as he imbibed 14 rum and cokes .

Anyway trying to work when you can't talk is not easy at least so far today. I'm going to try to nap in the boardroom soon.

 

[Blaze rep.1]

Good times in tha Loops

What a gong show, it just gets better every year. A perfect mix of booze, narcotics, and women.....mixed in with a little football.

BlazeArmy, what was the story on PKWiz getting the MVP for Open tourney?? Considering the amount of booze that Limey consumed I'm surprised he could even see straight for most of the games. Rainzy pulled off another classic weekend by sleeping a total of 1 hour in 3 dayz. Looks like the Captain and Parkhead were dealing with the same fat pig we were on Friday night. The Law enforcement decided to kick 4 guyz out of their hotel room as they were passed out and making too much noise snoring...what a fcking joke. You have to give Stevie Ray/ T-Huk/ Parsley / and Gurnz credit for sucking it up and sleeping in their Van in the parking lot though....money.

Blazerep1whowastoopissedtomakeita3peatthisyear

 

[trece verde]

loops de looped....

Fun times.....pix yet to come. Lots of good blackmail ones....

Army - I'm guessing that was you across from Rainzy at Rota's on Sunday afternoon - should have introduced myself - I was the guy that Rainzy was comparing field rash with Glad to hear that you guys did well.

Not quite everything on the list accomplished, but most:

1) Le Chateau girls made it to the dance
2) Spurs made it past the first round
3) large quantity of recreational substances consumed
4) demolished the production capacity of several breweries
5) carded for offering to remove boogers from the nose of an opposing player with my left elbow (not sure why )
6) walkthrough of the Osbourne's house (note - when having a team barbeque, make sure that everybody goes to the same house. That way, even if it's the wrong one, it doesn't look quite so weird when only half a dozen people walk in through the neighbours' open front door and straight through their house looking for you....)

Saw this year's Pokes shirts - quite humourfull with the A&W theme. We'll have something suitable for next year....

Nice touch by some of the sides, donating winnings to the fire relief groups. What a surreal show Friday night; driving into town and seeing a red line running up the hill behind the reserve....

More later - packing to take the rodents to Orlando....

Stew

 

[Guinness]

Froot-cuking-loops

Classic again!!!

After reading Parkhead and The Captain's posts I can't really give many more details... Although, I probably wouldn't remember most of them???

I'll list a few K-Town moments from what I remember...

Friday:
3pm - Mileslong and yours truely getting dumped out of our golf cart on the 18th fairway... I am sure there was a HUGE pot hole somewhere, but none of the other 8 lads on the fairway happened to see it!!!
10pm - Who knows??? I do know we ended up @ Rivers though!!!
3am - some college birds hotel room??? I think the other lad I was with was the only other with a bevy at the time??? (again quite blurry)
4am - banging on my hotel room door for 25 minutes until Mileslong decides to get off his lazy passed out arse to let a brother in for some shut eye...

Saturday:
3pm - making my first appearence in the Garden... Only enough time to swally 8 or so until our next match @ 6:30pm...
7:41ish - staggering into the garden looking for some hydration and much needed shade!!!
10pm - shite shower and a shave... Mileslong, some skinny bird, "Big Bird" and a few hotties (they looked fan-tas-tic with beer goggles), our resident young stud John and a few others (I can't really recall their description) head over to Rivers again...
Good thing the kitchen was still open, the last food I had was an 11 O'Clock breaky at Denny's complete with a few bottles of Kokanee!!!
1:57am - Larrson decided to "take one for the team" (well his squad anyway) and was spotted on the dance floor snogging with Godzilla!!!
2:36am - Off to another co-ed's room seaking speach therapy... The voice box was well on its way to becoming non-existant...
Recall nothing after this point... (Any TTPer feel free to fill me in if you know my where abouts)

Sunday: AKA game day (nothing to do with football though)
noonish - witnessed Pocomo's PK extravaganza!!! Captain led it off in fine form!!! Finished off my Stella and headed for the Garden...
2pm - Sammy decides it would be quite entertaining if he'd keep throwing the beach ball out into the path of walking by birds!!! Magic Sammy!!! Besides the Blue bird in the wrinkled shirt that was some of the funniest stuff...
6pm - still in the garden getting schezazled...
8pm - laying on the nice cool floor of 7eleven in front of the refreshment fridges... Mileslong thought I'd hit my heed, but really I just found the cleanliness of the place quite fascinating...
10pm - waiting for a cab outside the Casino trying to nick one of the many birds cabs they'd arranged... I can't believe they felt sorry for us and thought we'd need it more than them???
11pm - somewhere in the dance I was told by squeks the Captain and Parkhead had been kicked out and then decided to actually drive home??? (In a state of shock)...
Some time around midnight - finally feeling a little tipsy!!!
2:30am - got a lift back to the hotel from young John...
3:30ish - Downtown and his merry bunch of rif raf come stumbling into our room... I'd almost drifted off, so I decided to get another beer from the cooler...
4am - Downtown stands on top of the dresser droors and dictates another day in the Brown house... Silverfox was off the end of the bed with laughter...
4:30am - Woodsy chirps in with another classic renditionof "Alouetta"... "Droopy Droopy Droopy Tits"!!! The door goes and Downtown goes out to see why anyone in their right mind would come to our door???
5am - still not kicked out... nutmegs makes the huge mistake of passing out chin on chest... Yes she gets stiched with an army helmet, salt, sugars non-equivilant known as equal, toothpaste, a picture, chair, table and what ever else Downtown could find!!!
Fan-tas-tic!!! What a laugh!!!
6am - bed time and we still haven't been kicked out!!! (that tub o goo pig was nowhere in sight...
10am - K vale 7 explains to nutmegs why her hair is full of chalky white powder... I show her the camera that witnessed the event... Now it's just a matter of time before we get those pix posted!!! (I hope K Vale 7 knows photoshop???

Guinnessbarelybreathingbutbeginningtogethisvoiceback!!!

 

[k-vale7]

So Captain, I was absolutely starving Sunday night, I held out all day long not eating a morcel of food. For what you ask? For some of that lush, green, leafy, just-watered-goodness we like to call plants. There would have been nothing better than a mouthful of dirt and roots, the way it gets in between your teeth and stays there awhile so you can be reminded of it again and again, a gift that keeps on giving...magical. At least you had an excuse, but it's still just an excuse. Trav and I were dissapointed to say the least, maybe next year.

Megs, B, and I enjoyed winning with our Kamloops team, in PKs by the way, and no I did not take one. Although my confidence did take a boost after we watched a girl from the other team basically hit the Canadian springs water truck on one of hers, at least I didn't do that, thank god.

I'd also like to thank all the people who went back to the exec. inn for all the silly antics that went down after the dance, speeches, droopy boobs chants, quiet bee-bops, chairs, desks, pictures, rolled-up tens and coffee mate, most of it on the expense of Nutmegs who was brilliant that night, maybe not aware of it, but brilliant nonetheless. Good times.

Bee to the Bop

 

[Captain Shamrock]

K-Vale,

You have to understand. We had just been kicked out of our hotel and were not in the best of moods, especially since we weren't even in our fcuking rooms. Anyway, going to the dance in that frame of mind would not have been a good thing, especially if anyone looked like that fat cnut of a cop. So I apologize from the heart of my bottom.

You went back to the Exec Inn and didn't get kicked out? Fcuk. Fcuk.Fcuk.Fcuk.

I WILL be going to Kamloops next year again and we will finish the stash of plants that were waiting for us. Even if I wasn't there, I thought you and DITH had enough 'expertise' in picking out the proper ones.

Congrats on your 'win' with 'your' team.

 

[BlazeArmy]

Blaze Rep.1,

It's true the pkwiz won a top goalie award. He would have won the MVP if we could have got the game to extra time according to the ref. for that he won a monogrammed chair which I'm delivering tonight. More important than the chair he was declared the Tour de Bone winner and will be presented with his yellow jersey in a ceremony on Thursday.

I believe Mr.Raines himself told me he had 4 hours sleep total yesterday but who's counting.

Voice is making a comeback , I now can be heard in more than one level of voice. Megaphone might need to come up next year instead of whiteboard.


Personally I think Parsely should get the MVP of tourney
20 minutes of playing time=3 yellows and 1 red card. That is pure magic on the field.

Stew
Yes, that was me. His field rash was much worse on Monday after he decided to rip all skin off thigh area.

 

[Stepchild]

no finish

A final message from Coach b/f receiving my release papers:
I would like to thank all the Highlanders for their magical efforts on the field, I believe we officially were the first team eliminated from the touney. Next year we will enter the rec. division and try again. I cannot believe high ball could not take us to the promise land.
Downtown, what can I say. If it wasn't for your masterful efforts in net on sunday, we would have been down at least 6 by half-time. Also, the efforts during the Rangers meeting on sunday morning before the game (thanks to the 4 younsters that let Silver fox, Jacko the tank, Downtown and myself into their room) was one to remember.....we almost fooled them with the onside kick.
Thanks to Grand Prairie for showing us how to play a top quality style of football, I am sure everyone else took notes
Guiness, you cannot be off side from your own end. This is important to remember if you are a sweeper, again thanks to Downtown for stopping that beakaway.
Silver fox, I am sorry for taking you out of the game. Remember, even Cal Ripken had to quit sometime. I am sure no one is going to break your record of 30 years. Besides, here is to another 30 years!
Balsa, again only you can come up with such a mystery injury. Remember, when you ask for Dr's advice.....take it! Trust me, advil really does help pain.
Pocomo, brilliant.... from Start to finish. Nice jerseys
Megs, an important message (for next time)....do not fall asleep when Downtown is in the room.
For the rest of the Highlanders that were not mentioned, there always is next year. You have a year to prepare.
As for me, only I could blow a sure thing....not once, not twice, but three times. I would like to thank alcohol and no finish for these ones.

 

[Balsa]

Stepchild

Balsa, again only you can come up with such a mystery injury. Remember, when you ask for Dr's advice.....take it! Trust me, advil really does help pain.

Hence the name Balsa.

I must say your medical advice was probably accurate but aren't Advil supposed to be swallowed. Or is dropping the biggest bottle of Advil I have ever seen on the injury a new method of treatment? ( such brotherly love) I guess it wasn't serious enough for you so you tried to make it worse.

I have to say that overall this was a brilliant weekend. I was glad to get my 5 minutes of game time in from Coach Stepchild. The garden was amazing as were all the Highlanders games.

Lion I guess you showed everyone why you Lions are going to premier eh?

 

[nutmegs]

Who slipped something in my drink?!?!

I wish I wish I wish I hadn't KO'd with Downtown in the room that night. Because otherwise all you guys could have said about me was that I had the best goal celebration of the weekend. (Very disappointed that Guiness listed the sleeping incident as a highlight and omitted the glacier berry chug.)

I guess now I will have to do an undercover mission to K-vale7's house and steal the film with those very embarrassing pictures. And even though everyone said I was really funny that night I still may have to make Downtown pay the next time I see him.

Other than those unfortunate few hours, our two nights in the Loops were unforgettable. I think we got lost about 6 times in two days and BTW if anybody up there meets a pyscho cabbie named Ted be sure to thank him for providing our lost and drunken friends with a bed for a few hours. Looking forward to next year and playing enough games to earn a chance to win a chair (won last year and all I got was a Kokanee bag )

nutmegswhocanneverlookatequaltoothpastetablesandchairsthesamewayagain

 

[larsson]

Well guiness thanks for the memories that will in print .Bastard.Well in case u missed it i rebounded quite nicely with a girl from edmonton who was a little trimmer.

 

[knvb]

Picking on someone your own size so to speak?

 

[Captain Shamrock]

who was a little trimmer.

That is like saying Rosanne Barr is a little trimmer than Rita McNeil. There is a lot of room for error in that statement, Larsson.


Did you have to roll either of them in flour?