Best & Worst on-pitch slags

[Regs]

What's the best or worst slag you've heard someone say on the pitch?

Against Inter yesterday, some young I-tie with a bad frosted lid came up with the gem "bitch" right in front of the Peg bench... surely one of the worst slags ever, ranking up there with "nice touch 15".

Such amateurs...

~TB.

 

[Keeper]

There was a good one a couple of weeks ago: Bimini's v. ACM. One of our veteran defenseman stuffs some ACM striker who was trying to beat him on the outside, gets up and exclaims: "You're half my age!"

Classic.

 

[kurgan]

Regs,

Are you sure you want to start this thread with the inevitable 'He's bald...' lurking? Ah well, I'm sure there'll be both best and worst ones coming.

Kurganwantingtosurfbutofftomoremeetignsinstead.

 

[Regs]

Keeping it real

Kurgan,

That would be an off-the-pitch slag which, as you know, this thread is not about ... TTP is looking for slags shouted by players, not wound-up Croats sitting on the sideline, wondering when their next date is going to show up on the Croat website.

~TB.

 

[Jimmy Holiday]

Heard them way too many times

I've heard many slags about me being Domo's Brother,but the best I've heard so far was,your not as half as good as your brother is and he isn't that good anyways.This coming from a player at the Nations cup who i believe plays in the 2nd division.

Regs

I'm gonna make Carm my bitch the next time we play you
Who was the player that called you bitches?

 

[Regs]

Not-half-as-good-as-johnny-holiday,

Number 13 I think was the number... second half sub, young guy, bad frosted-tips lid.

He said it to Thomas after a tackle.

~TB.

 

[Zaurrini]

And I thought "nice touch 15" was a classic?

Sorry, regs.

It was cold, and my toe/brain was numbing up nicely to be a second half sub...
Although, I did say "nice touch 15", i was clearly under the Inter tent sipping on some Sambuca and coffee....not sure who shouted it from the Peg Side.

 

[The Apprentice]

Very proud to know that all of the slags have come from the i-tals...can't wait to don the blu and yellow this year in the i-tal league.

theapprenticewhowillburnajuntaforthei-tals.

 

[Rude]

The best one I heard was a few years back, but still a classic.
it was directed at the referee with the artificial eye.
After a few missed calls, one of our guys exclaims,
"Come on ref, if you're not gonna use your eye, put a patch on it!"
Not the most p.c. comment, but the ref had a sense of humour and
only gave him a yellow.

Cheers

 

[knvb]

By a Ref no less....

It was the usual game in Slurrey I was having a Stink showand Guinness was on the bench. Anyway I was having one of "those" game and I would not shut up about the Ref (Sounds like a coppertone post I know) when he said to me " Its not my fault you picked today to be the worst player out here! "

Needless to say I shut the fcuk up!

I don't know his name but its that young lad with a semi crew cut black hair looks a bit over weight. Not a bad ref unless he does Inter games that is.

 

[Mr Coppertone]

KNVB

Just to let you know I read that. I think the ref nailed you right on the button.


Coppertoneisveryupsetwithknvbandhewillnotbegettingawindrepellantwifebeaterfromme

 

[knvb]

Jimmy will sort me out

Coppertone~

I don't need a beater from you Jimmy will sort me out once I wash his I-Roc and leave a wee bag o Lerb in the glove.

 

[The Apprentice]

KNVB,

Thats my I-ROC where your supposed to leave the bag of lerb.

thapprenticewhoisupsetthatknvbforgothislerb.

 

[Mr Coppertone]

KNVB

It looks like your pissing all the I-ties off and you won't be getting that wind repellant wife beater.

ApprenticeIhaveabagoflerbifyouwantit

 

[whataboutbob]

Wilkie's Line

Niel Wilkinson always uses:

What's the score?

It is a bad call and I had to restrain myself from using it back on him when we were kicking Slurrey's ass 2-0.

 

[whataboutbob]

Worst PInC Slag

1992 Kelowna Tourney

Westside up 2-1 at half. Westside player with one arm shouts at half time "2-1, buddy".
Club I player Response:
"Ya, 2 arms to 1".

That is definately the worst.

 

[knvb]

Ohh noooo Im pissing off the I-ties! What will I ever do? Apprentice I didn't forget it Im just ah... holding it for you.

Bob~

What about Kelowna last year Sapp down 2 -0 nill 10 mins into the second half Slurrey's done for the day and are ALL pirtched in the garden. Can you hear Sapp sing NOOO NOOO. What were your comments?

 

[whataboutbob]

I Give Up

KNVB

I really don't recall my comments. Refresh them for me...of course you will.

It is amazing how Slurrey holds on to those precious memories of the Kelowna tourney.

 

[Dude]

Here's the worst...

I pulled this one once in my younger, much dumber days...

I was 18 and playing a men's game on an Indian reserve in Agassiz (a long fukcing drive, even from Coquitlam). I think it was the Chehalis Chiefs, but I can't be sure. All I know is that the filed was "lined" with old car and truck tires.

Anyhow, I made the mistake of getting into it with the sideline, and came up with this beauty: "Go back to your case of Lysol!"

Note: not a smart thing to say on an Indian Reserve. That game sort of ended early, and we had our beers on the way home. I recommend NOT saying the same thing, just in case somebody out there is really stupid and was actually thinking about it.

 

[knvb]

Back 2 Back

Just remember Bob Back 2 back champs! As for the comments I was hoping you would remember! That's why I asked.

Slurrey's done for the day and ALL pirtched in the garden...

Ring a bell?