The Captain and Parkhead at Parkhead

[Buckfast]

A height joke......Stop, my fcukin' sides.

Dear Rocky Dennis,

Based on your last post, I would consider your sense of humour rather "keeper-esque".

As an ambassador of Canada, you have five days to sort it out.

If you get your head out of the Captain's crotch anytime soon, you may have chance. Swallow and get on with it.

Buckfast.

 

[ParkHead]

Based on your last post, I would consider your sense of humour rather "keeper-esque".

OUCH



Thanks Bucky,


I had forgotten why I hadn't missed you. BTW I do believe you still owe me a pint. For what, I don't really remember but I'm sure I can make something up.


Maybe your Uncle Billy Mason will buy me pint? Nah, probably not he will still be grieving after another Auld Firm loss.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

If you get your head out of the Captain's crotch anytime soon, you may have chance. Swallow and get on with it

Nice touch, Bitter Bluenose Buckfast. I couldn't expect anything more, I guess, from a Croatian who thinks he is protestant. For our Croatian friends on TTP, that was not a dig at you. I know I am no giant, but the short man syndrome is alive and kicking in Buckfastland. It's all about the sugar, I guess.

 

[ParkHead]

3 days until departure. Celtic scared myself a little this morning with their injury time winner. Thank you big JOHAN for keeping the race on. The winner of the Auld firm match this weekend will clearly be in the drivers seat heading down the stretch.

Couldn't of picked a bigger match to attend, Hey Captain



I believe we prepared ourselves for the trip a little last night. Just setting the tone....



Parkhead

 

[Fastshow]

twisted rubber arm.........

Lads,

I've just come off the blower with Saint who, as ever, wants me to organise his life for him. I cannot possibly do that but I'll try and organise this weekend's punch-up. Sorry, that should read 'meeting'.

I'm out Friday night on a large one at Fabric so I'll go straight through and meet up at a mutually decided venue in Glasgow Saturday afternoon for more physical punishment. Captain, you need to address your PM box. Immediately if not before. Get Parkhead's finger out. Good.

Saint and I will be staying with Johnny Mad Dog's newly-transplanted Scottish family so I'll make some subtle enquiries about the availablity of a place for you two as well. He may be a certifiable nutbar but Mad Dog's nowhere near as bad as Buckfast's mob.

Game on.

 

[Fastshow]

result......

First round's on me............

Booking Vonfirmed
That's it! Your flight booking is now confirmed. Remember, easyJet DOES NOT ISSUE TICKETS, so please make a note of these details. All you need to check-in is your passport (passport or other photographic ID for flights within the UK; photographic ID is now required for domestic flights) and confirmation number.

Your confirmation number is E***FV4.

Your outbound flight: Saturday 08 March, flight 893
departs London Stansted at 06:50, arrives Glasgow at 08:10

Your passenger: Mr Fastshow

Total amount: 42.50 GBP paid using i w r ascough's Switch card.



Burnsie, respond to your PM for fcuk's sake. It's not as if you've owt better to do...........

 

[Rangerforever]

Lads: FYI:

The Govan Bowling Club makes a cracking cup of tea and the best HOT CROSS BUNS you've ever tasted.

As a result of viewing Saint's Daddy's attire every Tuesday and Thursday night at the fitba club, I can only assume you will be in the minority with the three Musketeers.

Best wishes and unlucky with the company,

RF

 

[Buckfast]

Capt. & PH,

Uncle William just called to advise that he has yet to hear from either of you lot.

What the fcuk? I go out of my way, even after the predictable Webster jibes, to secure you a large single bed at Casa de la King Billy, Prince of Orange. Ingrates.

Let me know asap. The Larkhall Championi celebrations shouldn't be missed.

Word of warning. I would recommend that Fastshow remain on the southbound train.The locals are not too fond of Lionsgateshire-ites.

C'mon the TEDDY BEARS!

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Thanks again for your hospitality, Bucky.

Fasty, I have sent the PM. Apparently, Parkhead's cousin owns a pub in Glasgow, so I will let him sort that out. It might be a meeting point? Otherwise, we will figure something out, I'm sure......Looking forward to it. BTW, if I brought a litre and a half of vodka in a water bottle, will they open to check? Otherwise, I'm going to be fcuking broke by the time the plane arrives in Toronto, let alone London. Any ideas, gentlemen?

 

[ParkHead]

Second round is on me then Fasty & Saint. Fasty I can arrange a place to stay for The Captain and myself if you have already got somewhere for you and Saint to stay. Morrison's is the name of the pub my cousin owns, so we should make a little appearance there at some point. I will leave the rest of the arrangements up to you and the Captain. The countdown is on boys.



See you boys on Saturday night in the heart of Glasgow.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

We'll just meet you at one of the pubs in Glasgow...

Pubs in Glasgow
Pubs : G : Glasgow




100 Acre

13th Note Ltd.

A & C Hamilton & Co.

Actionstream Ltd

Alba Inns Ltd

Alhambra Inn

Anchor Bar

Anne-Marie & Bruce Mcclean

Arlington Bar

Athena Taverna

B Js Bar & Diner

Bairds Bar

Bar 67

Bar Qui

Barrhill Social Club

Beechings Public House

Bensons Bar

Beresford Bar

Best Cellars (scotland) Ltd

Big Blue Bar

Big Muff Inns Ltd

Blakeleys Bar

Boozers Ltd

Bourbon Street Bar

Brahms & Liszt

Brian Lee (1997) Ltd

Bridgeton Bar

Briggs Bar

Buchanan Taverns Ltd.

Bugle Bar

Burgharms Ltd

Buzzy Wares Ltd.

Cabin Bar

Cafe Delmonicas

Cafe Zas Ltd.

Campbells Lounge Bar

Captains Rest

Carbeth Inn

Carnegies Leisure Group Ltd.

Carrigans Bar

Caseys Drum

Cathkin Bar & Lounge

Cee Dees

Century Taverns Ltd

Chasebay Ltd.

Chryston Tavern

Circle Bar

Clachan Bar

Clarendon Bar

Clutha Vaults

Coach House Inn

Coach House Inn

Commercial Bar

Commercial Inn

Coopers Bar

Coralpine Ltd

Corn Exchange

Cottage Bar

Counting House

Cross Stobs Inn

De Quinceys

Deans Bar

Doctor Gormans

Dominion Bar

Dow Jones

Drummonds Bar

Eadie Cairns Ltd.

Eat Drink Co Ltd

Echo Bar

Fat Boabs Ale House

Fiddlers Bar

Fiddlers Court

Findleys Bar

Firhoist Ltd

First Glass

Fitter & Firkin

Fixx Ii

Florida Park

G1 Group Plc

Gantry Bar

Gartforth Ltd

Garvale Inn

Georgic Bar

Gleniffer Taverns Ltd

Granny Blacks

Grant Arms

H Daso

Hampden Bar

Hart Brothers (1988) Ltd.

Hatt Group International Ltd.

Hecla Arms

Heraghtys Bar

Hielan Jessie

Horseshoe Bar

Imperial Bar

J & K Crawford

J Grier

J R Tennent

Jade Leisure Ltd.

James Gilroy & Co. Ltd.

Jarveys Inn

Jed Bar Co Ltd

Jintys Ltd

Jock Pamsons

Kelburn Bar

Kellys Bar

Kiloran Bar

Latimers Lounge Bar

Lea-Rig Public House

Legends Lounge Bar

Lettuce Holdings Ltd.

Lettuce Out (west) Ltd.

Lions Den

Lochwood Taverns Ltd.

Lyalls Bar

Lynns Bar

Macintoshs Bar

Macsorleys Bar Public Ho

Mail Coach

Masonic Arms

Maxwell Arms

Mcchuills Straight No Chaser

Mckinnons Bar

Mcphabb Taverns Ltd.

Millcroft Taverns Ltd.

Millennium (glasgow) Ltd.

Molendinar Bar

Mollinsburn Inn Ltd.

Montgomerie Arms

Moriartys Wine Bar & Bistro

Morven Function Suite

Muirhead Bakeries Ltd.

Munns Vaults Ltd.

Nashvilles Bar Ltd

New Monaco Bar

New Regent Bar

Nia-Roo Bar

Nickie Tams

Oneills Irish Bar

Oneils Irish Bar

Oakwynd Ltd.

Old Black Bull

Old House Inn

Palaceum Bar

Park Lane Tavern

Parkville Bar

Parkville Road House

Partick Tavern

Paul Storey

Penny Lane

Picture & Piano

Pirn Inn

Pongo Ltd

Queens Park Bar

R H & J G Graham

Rhinesdale Tavern

Richards Bar

Riggs Bar

Riverside Tavern

Roadhouse Public House

Robby Burns

Rowallan Bar

Rowanbridge Ltd

Rowantree Inn

Rufus T Firefly

Scarecrow Grill

Scobies Bar

Scotch & Rye

Scotsmans Bar

Sefton Bar

Seven Ways Bar

Silver Larch

Smiddy Inn

Smugglers Inn

Springfield Vaults

Spud Mulligans

Spur Bar

Squirrel Bar

Staffords Bar

Standard Taverns Ltd.

Stanley Bar

Stardash Ltd

Station Bar

Station Bar

Steam Packet Co Ltd

Stewartfield Farm

Stirling Castle Bar

Stonefield Tavern

Stones Hotel

Strathies Bar

Strathmore Taverns Ltd.

Strathnorth Ltd

Strathspey Bar

Strawberry Fields Promotions Ltd

Stroud Tavern

Swan Inn

Swan Inn

Sweepers Lounge Bar

Tavern Bar

Tennents Bar

Tennents Bar

The 1 & 7 Pub Co Ltd

The Albion Way

The Allison Arms

The Alpen Lodge

The Anvil Inn

The Apollo

The Ashfield Bar

The Auld Boathouse

The Auld Hoose

The Auld Hoose

The Ballochmyle Bar

The Bank

The Bank Inn

The Banks Bar

The Barnhill Tavern

The Barrell House

The Barnhill Tavern

The Barrell House

The Bells Bar

The Big Glen

The Black Bull

The Black Bull

The Black Bull

The Blob Shop

The Brewers Tap

The Brewhouse

The Brig Tavern

The Brigg Inn

The Bristol Bar

The Brothers Bar

The Budgie

The Cairn

The Cart Bar

The Cask & Still

The Castle Arms

The Celtic Tavern

The Clyde Inn

The Comet Bar

The Cottage Bar

The Court Bar

The Croft Bar

The Crown Creighton Bar

The Crystal Bell

The District Bar

The Doon Inn

The Dove Cot Hall

The Drookit Dug

The Duke Bar

The Empire Bar

The Ettrick Bar

The Ettrick Bar

The Exhibition Bar

The Festival Bar

The First & Last Bar

The Fox & Hound

The Gables Bar

The Gairdners Airms

The Gallery

The Gardenhall Inn

The Gate

The Gauger

The Glen Bar

The Glen Bar

The Grapes

The Griffin Bar

The Harmsworth House

The Hayfield Bar

The Hielan Mans

The Hillington

The Horseshoe Bar

The Horseshoe Bar

The Hub Bar

The Hurlet Brewers Fayre

The Imperial

The Jeanie

The Keystane

The Kingfisher

The Ladywell Bar

The Lampost

The Langfield Inn

The Langmuir Inn

The Lawburn Inn

The Lee

The Lismore

The Living Room

The Londoner

The Lord Nelson

The Malletsheugh Inn

The Mallons Bar

The Millcroft

The Mission Bar

The Mitre Bar

The Monkey Bar

The Montrose Bar & Diner

The Netherton Inn

The New Blane Valley Bar

The New Hawthorn Bar

The New Inn

The New Rogano

The Nile Bar

The Oak Bar

The Oak Tree Inn

The Old College Bar

The Old Kilpatrick Inn

The Old Toll Bar

The Oriental

The Osprey

The Outside Inn

The Pines

The Pippin Bar

The Press Bar

The Prince Charlie Bar

The Queens Bar

The Rabbie Burns

The Railway Tavern

The Red Comyn

The Red Lion Bar

The Redan Bar

The Redbrae

The Ritz Bar

The Ritz Bar

The Royalty Ale House

The Sadie Frost

The Saltire

The Scaramouche

The Scotia Bar

The Sheddens Bar

The Shields Bar

The Silver Banks

The Sir John Stirling Maxwell

The Snaffle Bit

The Solid Rock Cafe

The Sportsman Bar

The Square Rig

The Standard Bar

The Stewart Inn

The Stoat & Ferret

The Sun Inn

The Sutherland Arms

The Swan Inn

The Tollbooth Bar

The Torrance Inn

The Tower Bar

The Townhouse Partnership

The Traders Tavern

The Victoria Bar

The Victoria Bar

The Village

The Waldorf

The Wallis Bar

The Wee Mans Bar

The Welcome Inn

The Westering Winds

The Windsor Bar

The Windsor Tavern

The Woodside Inn

Thistle Bar

Thornlie Arms

Three Judges

Times Square

Timewide Ltd

Titwood Bar

Travellers Rest

Treble Two Bar

Tudor Inns Ltd

Tudor Taverns

Twa Corbies

Valentini (scotland) Ltd

Viceroy Bar

Victoria Bar

Victoria Bar

Village Inn

Waverley Bar

Waxys Of Candleriggs

Welcome Inn

West Muir House Ltd

Westburn Bar

Westburn Bar

Wheatsheaf Inn

Whiskey Joes Ltd.

Wintersgills Bar

Wolbirns Wharf Bar Diner

Yates Wine Lodge


Find pubs in locations beginning with:
A : B : C : D : E : F : G : H : I : J : K : L : M : N : O : P : R : S : T : U : V : W : Y


Golf Courses : Indian Restaurants

 

[Jinky]

The Horseshoe Bar

The Horseshoe Bar

Quite right to list it twice.
Superb pub. It boasts the longest bar in Europe.

I would avoid anything called The Big Blue Bar.


I love The Outside Inn.

Only in Scotland.

 

[Fastshow]

countdown.......

BTW, if I brought a litre and a half of vodka in a water bottle, will they open to check?

Who are they? Who would win a fight? If you're on about the cute air hostesses then I would wager that you'll be all right. The main job is getting your contraband past Huey and Duey at Vancouver International where they treat everyone as though they're Osama Bin Liner. You're in Vancouver, lads, not the Gaza Strip, relax and let the Captain have his vodka. I would suggest, however, that you try and tart up your vodka receptacle. A pretty bow should do the trick.

Second round is on me then Fasty & Saint.

I'm buying the first round. How the arsing clag did I become responsible for buiying the third as well? your maths are about as deft as Fat Monkey's time-keeping. Is the Captain exempt from doing the honours? Will we be supping from his big fcuk-off two litre of wobbly 'Mountain Dew'?

The Captain's a plumber. They make loads of dosh, he'll be able to get his in, I have faith. Even if my lot wear blue.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

What are they charging now for the two litres of wobbly pop, Fasty? I will buy the 3rd, 7th, and 11th rounds. I have a fascination with prime numbers(for KNVB - numbers which can only be divisible by one and itself). Thanks for your tip on getting my stash through the airport.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Que?

I don't see Morrisons on our extended pub list, Parkhead. Are you pulling our leg? What gives? Can you sort this out immediately? Thanks.


Captain

 

[Fastshow]

revealing........

I dunno about charges for two litre measurements, Captain. Even in this, the world's foremost drinking culture, I don't see many staggering to the bar and ordering measures of 'two litres' at a time.

I can only assume Belfast is different.

More importantly, what are we going to do about Saint's self-enforced drinking ban? He says he's off the sauce entirely as he's become obsessed with his fitness. I don't believe it either but it's what he says everytime I speak to him. Honest.

By the way, isn't Morrison's a green grocer? Someone's been taken for a fool, perhaps?

This might help. Or it might not.

 

[Jinky]

Maybe it's in Port Glasgow.

Be careful when you order a pint.

The barman will no doubt ask you, "red or white?"

 

[ParkHead]

Pub

Morrison's Bar

220 Clyde St

Glasgow G1

0141 248 - 5329

Fastshow/ Saint that is the info I believe you need.


Captain I will be at your house in 25 mins.

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Tickets are in hand, as is the Celtic shirt. A quick stop at the casino on the way home from the airport gave the Captain a $75 profit before departure. At $5 a crack, this will get us a solid 14 drinks before arriving at Toronto. I wonder if there is a casino at the Toronto Airport? We will be posting from Belfast and Glasgow at some point. Things are falling into place nicely and all we need now is a big Celtic win!

Until next time.....

 

[Captain Shamrock]

Great weather forecast

Today Tomorrow Fri Sat Sun 6-10 Day



PM Showers


High: 48
Low: 38


Mostly Cloudy


High: 46
Low: 41


Rain


High: 46
Low: 35


Light Rain


High: 49
Low: 35


Showers


High: 49
Low: 39