Div 2 Div 2 Rumours & Other Gossip

[Dapotayto]

Perplexed Potato

I am mystified. Three JB babies on the way? Are all three of you adopting? I ask this because a standard birthing by a human female would "generally" imply that heterosexual sex had occurred at some point in time, yes? Yet the following Jim Beam advertisement implies that something much different than heterosexuality is rampant among your team. Not only that but fcuk, that was quite a raping you gave the NKH boys yesterday. So you see, things just don't add up. What the fcuk is really going on here?

 

[Therapist]

You'd have to ask Hammer about that as he's the one responsible for getting us the sponsorship from JB. Besides I'm one of the three, and last time I checked my wife didn't have balls or a penis. Maybe you should check with some of the single guys on the team, as I sometimes wonder about their sexuality myself.

 

[iron mike]

Still groggy from the knockout blow delivered by the Beam. We thought we had the better chances in the 1st half but still down 2-0. 2nd half was a disaster for us. Not much to play for other than helping others out. The NK train will get rolling again and will be steaming in time for the cup run!!!

 

[hammer]

Potato,

Intriguing Beam ad that you have posted. Where did you find that beauty?? The reason, as the Marketing director of JIm Beam Brands, we have launched that print medium, targeting the "Gay" community" and was soley distributed through gay friendly magazines..... You must have a number of subscriptions as they are not circulated to the general public nor is it readily available.

I understand you were a spectator at our match??? Did you come out to see some good football or were you out to watch your "partner" play goal for NKH. Nice little get-up all that was missing was a ten-gallon hat and white cowboy boots. I am sure he wears his shirt for "bull riding days" every Thurs at the Oddessy!!!

cheers, Hammer

BTW, the ad was copywrited so you will be hearing from my inhouse counsel regarding renumeration and damages.
rr

 

[BJB]

KUDOS to NS

Great Game by NS as for us not that great. yet the 1st half looked like we had a chance, the 2nd was a disaster. We couldn't put our chances away, unlike NS who scored there first 3 goals on 5 chances??? Yesterdays game looked like i was playing PS2 Fifa 2002 and I was working on my chip shots.

But no excuses it's our fault we haven't trained since ahhhhh our last game dec something. ohh well. one more game, and we will win that one to finish the season at .500 at a beautiful 7 and 7. Not bad considering we started at 1 and 5.

Maybe the cup we will get a 3rd chacne at you guys.
On to the CUP!

The Cup Draws on the 21st correct??

 

[Dapotayto]

Statement for the defense

Hammer,

I have been in contact with my attorney in regards to the impending copyright infringement litigation. He feels I have a very good chance to beat the charges as I have a several viable defenses. The most obvious of course is mental incompetency. I can do an academy award calibre retard impression (Ed Norton's got nothing on me). As a fall-back defense I could claim not being under personal autonomy as I must have sucked back about five reefers prior to stumbling across that picture on the 'net. BTW, what do ya figure the guy in the ad is saying to his buddy? I think it's probably something like "You know, if you were really my friend you'd...".

In regards to goalkeepers with diverse sexual habits I don't think anyone's heard from ours for weeks. If Godlike doesn't make an appearance soon we are considering signing one of those seven foot transvestites from the Odyssey. That should scare the shite out of anyone coming in for crosses.

I only saw your fifth and sixth goals. Both were well taken, I must say.

Cheers

 

[hammer]

Potato,

Thank you in advance for your pending legal action. I am a bit confused on your defense strategy?

In reference to your mental ability at the time of the breach of contract (unauthorized down loading of copywrited material) were you of sound mind and body?

The underlying principle is determining your "Capacity to Contract"
under common law some types of people (you?) lack the ability, competence, or capacity in certain respects to enter into contracts that bind them.

In the discovery process, the defendent (you) did admit to having too many ****tails, and reefer to be of sound mind and body as the law protects a person of unsound mind or incapacitated through drinks and drugs.

However, an insane, drunk or stoned person is liable for a reasonable price for the goods and or services. In practice, this individual upon becoming sober or sane, has a problem of evidence in proving incapacity at the time of the breach.

This burden of evidence must show not only that you were incapable of a rational decesion at the time of the breach but also that the other party (Jim Beam) was aware of your condition.

So in laments terms, the Plantiff (Jim Beam Brands) were not aware of your condition, so end result "Pay up Buddy"!!!!

Potato, let's discuss damages....... I would think a starting point to avoid further legal action would be a cold case of Heini 's.

Please respond by Jan 15 or I am going to have to increase my method of enforcing judgement!!

Hammer (attorney at law)

hammercantbelievehestillrememberscontractlaw?

 

[vratar]

NK NSU game

This game meant nothing to us, in fact we barely fielded a team.
A couple of last minute arrivals graciously strolled onto the park , hey we have 11 guys, wow I came out all this way for this. But the icing on the cake was when I saw who the ref was. I think we would of stomped on these guys if attitude, focus and more dedication towards the team took place. However let our lackluster attitude speak for itself, we lost 6-1 in an exhibition style performance.

 

[Therapist]

Vratar

It sure sounded like from previous posts that it meant nothing to you guys. Seems to me that you guys pretty much had the same style of "exhibition" play last time we met. And very, very unlikely that you would have stomped on us if it was a different ref. Old excuse used by all at one time or another.

 

[Legroom]

"stomped on these guys"?

Vratar . . . I suggest a little counselling may be in order, for you my friend are in deep denial. Although I'm sure yesterday's game was not vintage NKH, it is the second time it's happened this season. For you to allude to a stomping seems a wee bit offside.
The first half was competitive and there were spells of good ball movement by both teams, although decent first touches were hard to come by. A combination of conditioning and the fact Beam threw away a three goal lead in our last match dictated the second half result.

 

[Reccos]

Legroom

Despite your offer of counselling assistance to your opponent, didn't we read that the score in the game was 6 to 1 for the other side? Now I'd call that something other than a close game!!

 

[vratar]

Therapist,

I was not referring to the officiator for our 6-1 loss to you guys. Although the ref made some bad calls which you guys never capitalized on, maybe it could have been 8-1.
You clearly outplayed us, and yes this was an exhibition style of play for our rebels.



Legroom,

Perhaps next time I will not use the word "stomped", it seems to bring out the sensitive side in you.

 

[Therapist]

Reccos

Get your scores straight. Nsu 6 NKH 1. Legroom was on the winning side. Plus I might add he had his third hattrick of the season.

Vratar,

I agree, the ref wasn't something to write home about. We could have had a few more, but the way some of us on the back line were lunging (totally all me) you guys could have had another or two. Luckily I can depend on my mates.

 

[Dapotayto]

Out of court settlement

Hammer,

After another consultation with my attorney he has informed me that if I was to retain his services he is more than likely to have me acquitted of all charges although his fee would probably run into the thousands of dollars. My other option is to settle out of court by providing the case of cold heini's you have suggested. As neither of these is acceptable to me I have decided to employ my own special strategy. I call it the "Gingerbread Man" strategy and it has proven its effectiveness many times over. Mostly against bill collectors and angry females. So, "Run, run, fast as you can, you can't catch me I'm the gingerbread man". Good luck tracking ME down.



On a side note, if over the next few weeks the season progresses towards a winner-take-all finale I would be willing to make a little side-bet. Heinekens, Guinness, Rum, something along those lines perhaps.

 

[watcher]

the facts

I stated at mid-season that the only team that impressed us was NSU, because even though we had a poor lineup in the first leg match, I still thought they moved the ball around proficiently. Now there might have been a similar result this time around, but NK did outchance NSU at least four to one in the first half and we were beyond unlucky to be down 2-0. We hadn't trained in over a month and didn't have our complete starting defence for the game. NK also has some other serious issues to deal with but none of these excuses should take anything away from NSU's victory. They are the better team right now (I guess that goes without saying). The reason I wish to share this with you all, is just so you know that NK has more quality than was witnessed at cleveland park. And once that comes back to the forefront, the players who do and did their jobs, even in this last came, can hold their heads high without having to endure future embarassments.
Here's/hoping/Hrvat/has/humiliation/hung/high/heretofore

 

[Keeper]

A special thanks

Dazza,

Please thank Chris for a lovely Meraloma win over Metro-Ford (3-2) yesterday. We appreciate your help in the matter. Nice to see you've made it to the top.

 

[Therapist]

NSU 6 Champlain 0

Champlain showed and started with 7. Eventually got 9. Kudos to them for playing with a bit of heart and not getting hacky as I'm sure many teams would be a bit frustrated after awhile. still, with 11, I don't think that they would be a huge problem. ( that is, if we don't under estimate them next weekend) The score could have easily gotten out of hand, but due to lack of intensity it stayed at 6-0. Hmmmmmmm.....tied with Pt Grey.....I guess the pressure is on them. (?)

 

[Dapotayto]

Getting restless

I dunno know, seems like the pressure is pretty much evenly distributed among three teams now. Bombastic's in with a shout and should be a good game this weekend if it happens. Fcuk fcuk fcuk we haven't played in 2 months and then it snows the last two days. Have resorted to slide tackling my roommate's dog around the house to simulate hacking down strikers but he's starting to get annoyed and it just ain't the same ya know. Not ony that but I don't think he understands the trash talking. Damn, there ain't nothing to take the piss about if we don't ever play.

 

[watcher]

Da Potato (head)

Slide tackling your roommate's dog? Isn't that a polite term for beastiality or zoofilia. Are there any more BUGGERS on your squad?

Dapotato/dreams/of/doing/dirty/datchsunds/daily

 

[Dapotayto]

mmm...dachsunds

Crotch watcher,

I have a few questions regarding your post. Are you questioning the dog's sexuality? He doesn't appreciate it you freak. He is a pittie/rottweiler cross and he's trained to attack fat, hairy, out of shape soccer players so you're whole team is a target. And what's with "Are there any other BUGGERS on your squad?" question. Are you trying to take the piss or is that some kind of fcuked up come on? Coming from a guy who coaches a men's soccer team and calls himself the Watcher that's a fcuking borderline query, dude.